How does having a family member with schizophrenia affect your mental health?

[Music] foreign [Music] so we just had a small chat before this recording and I heard that you grew up with a father who had unreliable mental struggles and he had schizophrenia and I would like to know you know how did you live through this you know how did you work through this how was your studies like just the whole thing about like what was it like how did you manage at home with somebody like you who you looked forward to and you had no reliable you didn't know what was to be expected that the next moment yeah it was it was um quite challenging during childhood living with such a situation yeah so you felt very lonely you had no words to even describe it to anybody right like and I guess that's the reason for you to share the story you want other people who are in this boat to realize that there is a light at the end of the tunnel and you know yeah absolutely right you made it and it was hard to speak about in that time and especially challenging as growing up in that household how was it it like when you know you said you shared the first time about the growing up in this kind of environment and household with your wife how was that like what was the how was it first time finding words to speak up like what was your thought around it yeah when when I was like uh um chatting or you can say dating my uh uh wife at the time um I had this thing in mind like way before when I was like in college that whenever I meet my uh future partner I would uh let her know about this I never wanted to hide this kind of a thing it's a it's a big uh aspect right um and people uh should be very much aware of it um so I always had that in mind but I would take uh the step and take the gather some courage and speak did you ever think that she the person that who you may you know love or wanted to get married might reject you for this was that a thing on your mind honestly I almost had this thought that whenever I'll speak to the person who whom I want to get married about this uh she would she would not take it well not accept it either her or family and eventually I'll have a very very tough time finding finding your partner so I always had this thing yeah that fear was there right fear of yeah absolutely then judged right it was in Europe right then even to find the words I mean I would like to understand how did you gather the courage to speak up for the first time yeah yeah it was it was absolutely difficult but um like I let my uh wife know at the time that hey uh next day I'll be talking something very important uh to you something that I wanted to share about my childhood and family and things like that uh and then I uh I spoke about it fortunately I have uh two uh super women in my life versus my mom and second is my wife so she is very very supportive and she was absolutely fine with it she understood the situation and in fact she respect for me about so that that was really good thank you Jay for sharing your story I hope your story will inspire others that there is a light at the end of the tunnel you know when we grow up with a parent who is so difficult it is hard at that time but we can still find ways to you know be true to ourselves and find the support that we need and I'm glad you found it with your wife and your mother thanks for sharing your story thank you thank you so much