Overcoming Mental Health Stigma: Abraham’s Story

0:00 hey abraham how are you 0:03 i am great glad to be here 0:06 you talked about being off 0:10 a certain point of your life 0:12 and uh 0:14 do you want to talk about like what was 0:15 it the feeling of feeling off and what 0:17 was the turning point where you realized 0:19 you needed help 0:20 and what did you do to do that like what 0:23 were the processes that you followed 0:25 um for me when it comes to the turning 0:27 point 0:29 uh there were a couple of things at play 0:32 um one was that i grew up in a jamaican 0:35 household so i had two jamaican 0:37 immigrant parents growing up 0:39 and i also grew up in a christian family 0:43 and so there was this dynamic or this 0:45 unspoken rule of 0:47 uh we don't talk about our feelings our 0:49 emotions and and so i kind of grew up in 0:52 that environment where there wasn't 0:54 necessarily a safe space to talk about 0:57 anything related to mental health yeah i 1:00 didn't even know what mental health was 1:01 when i was younger so fast forward to 1:04 leaving home and being the first in my 1:06 family to go off to college in 2014 1:11 i started to experience stress because i 1:13 was a full-time student i was a 1:16 i had a full-time job i was trying to 1:19 have the full experience of what it's 1:21 like as a college student 1:23 and it became overwhelming and it was 1:26 stressful and i just 1:28 continued to push as if nothing was 1:30 wrong 1:31 um so that wasn't helpful and it led to 1:34 me having 1:35 um challenges mentally and emotionally 1:38 to the point where i went from being a 1:40 motivated 1:41 student to 1:43 not being able to get out of bed 1:45 so i knew that something was off because 1:49 normally i would be able to motivate 1:50 myself 1:52 to do things i would be able to get up 1:54 and exercise and feel better but for 1:56 some reason the motivational music 1:59 wasn't working the videos weren't 2:01 working the the friends weren't helping 2:04 and i just was i felt stuck so that at 2:07 that point i knew i i needed some sort 2:09 of help whatever help looked like at 2:11 that point yeah 2:13 and was there like 2:15 a moment where you were like juggling in 2:17 your mind that do i need help and i'm 2:19 still okay because you know there were 2:21 moments where you were not feeling so 2:22 bad but you were feeling bad 2:24 enough was there any friend or anybody 2:27 like you said your family did not 2:29 believe in like you know anything 2:31 related to mental health and you grew up 2:32 in that thing but was there any friend 2:34 who kept like pestering you like you 2:36 know 2:38 yeah you said the right word she was 2:40 pestering me 2:42 and i shared a little bit about this in 2:44 my presentation that you attended but um 2:47 yeah i had a friend and at the time i 2:49 did not like this friend because she 2:51 kept bothering me is what i call it 2:53 bothering me but now i'm so grateful for 2:57 that friend because 2:58 if it wasn't for that friend checking on 3:01 me and continuing to check on me i don't 3:03 know where i would be today and honestly 3:05 i don't know if i would be here today 3:07 because it got really dark for me and i 3:10 got to a really low point in my life 3:12 but um i had this friend so i'll give 3:15 you the the quick story yeah um i had 3:17 this friend and we met during during uh 3:20 undergrad 3:22 uh my first year 3:23 and we quickly developed a fast 3:26 relationship because we enjoyed doing 3:27 the same things and we both came from 3:30 immigrant 3:31 families and and so there was a 3:33 connection there so we became friends 3:34 pretty quickly yeah and and um 3:38 and again i went from being this 3:40 motivated enthusiastic go-getter to 3:44 isolating myself and this friend 3:46 um realized that i started withdrawing 3:49 myself and she knew something was off 3:51 because that's not the way i normally 3:54 operate 3:55 so she saw the signs and she saw that 3:57 something was off and so she would check 3:59 in on me but i would ignore her phone 4:00 calls ignore her text messages because i 4:03 didn't feel like myself yeah i didn't 4:05 want her to see me like this like i'm 4:07 known to be the strong friend the one 4:09 who's supportive but now i'm i can't 4:12 even support myself so he wants to show 4:14 the multiple side right of anybody 4:16 yeah i felt very shameful and 4:19 embarrassed with what i was experiencing 4:21 um but like you mentioned this friend 4:23 kept pestering me and 4:25 i remember i remember one weekend i was 4:28 at i was at home 4:30 and it was a beautiful day outside so i 4:32 live in florida and it was a beautiful 4:33 day outside the sun was shining the 4:35 weather was nice 4:38 but i found myself locked in my 4:40 apartment in my bedroom 4:43 underneath the covers with the blinds 4:45 closed 4:47 and 4:49 i was in between crying 4:52 and being 4:54 like 4:55 extremely upset 4:56 because i didn't know what was going on 4:59 and i didn't know how to fix it and it 5:01 just so happened that my best friend 5:03 decides to call me when i'm in this 5:05 situation and so she calls me 5:07 uh i decide to pick up the phone this 5:10 particular day and i remember she said 5:12 something that changed my life she says 5:16 i'm not getting off the phone 5:19 until you tell me what's really going on 5:22 and i remember when she said that i knew 5:25 that 5:27 she wasn't just asking out of courtesy 5:30 she wasn't just checking in on me 5:31 because that's what friends are for like 5:33 she she was really genuine about 5:36 supporting me and because i felt that i 5:38 decided for the first time to open up so 5:40 i opened up with her and i told her 5:42 everything i told her how i wasn't 5:44 sleeping at night because of the 5:45 negative racing thoughts i told her how 5:48 i didn't have an appetite so i wasn't 5:49 eating i told her how i didn't have any 5:52 motivation to go to classes to go to 5:54 work and i just didn't want to do 5:55 anything 5:56 and that's when 5:58 you know i felt safe for the first time 6:01 in my life because she listened to me 6:03 and then she says you know it sounds 6:05 like you're depressed 6:06 and i was like depressed because 6:09 remember 6:10 yeah why would i be depressed and 6:11 remember growing up we didn't talk about 6:13 things like that so i didn't even know 6:14 what depression was yeah like for me can 6:17 i be honest with you rubali absolutely 6:19 so 6:21 so 6:22 so for me when i thought about 6:24 depression i thought it was a white 6:26 person's issue 6:29 privilege right person yeah i thought 6:31 depression only affected a select group 6:34 of people who couldn't handle adversity 6:38 and so i thought it was for weak people 6:40 so when she said the word depression 6:42 actually took it as an insult i was like 6:45 how could you be calling me depressed 6:47 i think that is such a great point 6:49 abraham 6:51 the label right 6:52 yeah called depressed 6:54 right like how in our mind we say that 6:57 we are not that person 6:59 mm-hmm that's somebody else yeah yeah 7:01 and i battled with stigma i battled with 7:04 those negative perceptions i like to 7:06 call them lies right i battled with all 7:09 of these lies and um it finally got to a 7:12 point where i was sick and tired of the 7:14 same thing over and over again and my 7:17 best friend who called me that day 7:19 recommended that i see a counselor 7:21 yeah and um i ended up seeing a 7:22 counselor weeks later and that started 7:25 me on on my journey to getting treated 7:28 for depression uh and recovering so 7:32 and then you started this organ this uh 7:34 speaks speaks to inspire i see it right 7:37 behind you tell me a little bit about 7:39 that and what you're trying to achieve 7:40 with that 7:41 uh speaks to inspire is the mental 7:44 health solution for young adult 7:45 suffering and silence and so we work 7:48 primarily in colleges and universities 7:50 and we help institutions to develop 7:53 programming 7:54 that supports the mental health and 7:56 well-being of their students and that 7:59 also reduces stigma